Darrell and I were almost inseparable once we started dating in college. We even had a nickname - "DarJen". We lived on the same dorm floor, we ate nearly every meal together, and we arranged our schedules to take classes together when we could. It would scare me if we were still like that.
I very much enjoy spending time with Darrell. I'm pretty sure he'd say the same about me. But we like to do our own thing sometimes, too. I'm fairly crafty, have my smartphone nearly glued to my hand at all times, and love to run. Darrell can fix just about anything, takes an average of two days to realize he has a text or missed call on his smartphone, and strongly believes you should use an engine to get you where you need to go rather than your own two legs whenever possible. And that's ok. One of the things that I love about Darrell is that he's very much not me, but that he is completely willing to let me be me and to let me do my own thing.
You see, we do depend on each other; but we are not completely dependent on each other. I think there's a huge difference. I like the comfort of knowing that if something ever happened to Darrell, I should be able to provide for the kids and myself. I don't want to spend much time thinking about that, because I'd much rather die of old age at the same time as Darrell at about 95 years old (with all of our faculties intact and relatively healthy up until that point, please). But, I'm pretty sure I could do it if I had to, and he could, too. I'd have to hire help for lots of home maintenance; he'd move into a smaller house with a much larger garage (yes, we've discussed such things). I certainly don't think I'd want to start over and find another husband (they take much too long to try to train, believe me).
I like to think we've found a pretty good balance in our relationship. I hope you can find that, too.
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